Week 9: Without Fanfare
Dear Loved Ones,
On Monday, Sister Larsen and I filled out the evaluations for two-transfer missionaries. I requested to serve in a new location (though Boise has been fun and will always have a little piece of my heart). I can't wait to see where I end up! I have been praying that I can see the Lord's hand in my call and go somewhere I can do the most good.
I am now the proud owner of an orange Boise State University shirt. We were helping someone we teach clean out her closet and she gave it to me. I don't know what I'll do with it after the month is over. I'm definitely not going to wear it around BYU campus after my mission. My pet peeve is when students wear other college gear. I always want to stop people and say, "Hey buddy, I see Yale that you were dumb and rejected you after you bought that shirt in high hopes, would you mind burning it now?"
Boise is a nice enough town and I kind of like road trips, so maybe I'll drive up here someday if BYU ever plays BSU at an away game. I'd have to wear BYU gear to that, though.
This week, I taught a great lesson about temples to a returning member mother and her tween/teen daughters. One of the girls is 11. I looked over the temple pamphlet I wanted to give them and found it was outdated, so I pulled out a pen and edited the 12 to 11. When it came time to hand the pamphlet to them, the eleven year old was the one who reached out her hand. I gave it to her and explained that if she were to join the church, she's now old enough to enter the temple. Temple-related changes are big to me and I told them the story of how I finally got my temple endowment.
Some changes in the church are made with a lot of fanfare. Others are invisible. Manuals get updated and you have to read through them to notice any changes are there. Though President Nelson is lauded (rightly so) for introducing many changes in the church, the biggest change that affected me happened under President Monson. Historically, people didn't get their endowment until they were married, went on missions, or much later in life, if neither of those two happened. Barring single people from the temple simply because they haven't served missions is no more. At age twenty, I was one of very few of my friends to not be endowed yet. Being barred from a mission left me so thoroughly beaten down. I wanted to feel God's love for me and thought the best way I could do that would be to receive my endowment. I took temple prep twice. I researched temples worldwide, volunteered on an archeological dig where I sorted through pieces of the original Nauvoo Temple baptismal font, and read the Pearl of Great Price and Genesis, because I knew those parts of the scripture related to the temple. After all this, I told my bishop that I wanted to receive my endowment.
He told me, "You are more prepared to receive your endowment then any young person I've talked to, but I'm not going to let you because you aren't going on a mission." He showed me his outdated manual to explain his verdict.
That kickstarted the lowest spiritual year of my life. I had done nothing to make me unworthy of a temple recommend and I knew my desire was well within church policy. Three months later, my dad, who serves as first counselor to that bishop, looked through the updated online version of the manual and found that the paragraph barring non-missionaries from the temple had been removed. With my knowledge of that policy confirmed, I spent the next nine months asking my dad to ask that bishop to give me an endowment interview. It took a full calendar year for that to happen. In the meantime, I moved around to various wards with my transient college lifestyle. Three other bishops neglected to help me.
During this year of temple rejection, I often thought about the pre-1978 black members of the church. We talk a lot about how black men were historically barred from receiving the priesthood, but I think being barred from the temple is a much bigger deal because that affected black women as well.
It takes tremendous faith and grit to remain in a religion that has marginalized you. I have the greatest respect for those black members who remained in the church during that era. I felt like I had a lot in common with them that year and I am so, so grateful to be living in an era blessed by change, when temples are dotting the earth and anyone who is worthy can enter them.
My brother, who was baptized as a child but now attends an Episcopalian church, asked me why I remained in the church after all that was done to me. I told him, "There have been times I believed the church was not good, but I never believed the church was not true."
That's my first reason. My second reason is because I wanted the blessings of the temple in my life. Also, I wanted to be allowed to be a missionary, no matter how long that wait took.
On January 3, 2018, I received my endowment in the Salt Lake Temple. I finally felt love. On January 3, 2019, I woke up in Boise for my first day as a missionary.
I shared an abbreviated version of my story in this temple lesson this week.
This was the first lesson I prepared from scratch, rather than using Preach My Gospel or Come Follow Me. It's also my favorite lesson I've done so far. I'm proud of it. Sister Larsen said she felt the Spirit and I believe I made an impact on the family I was teaching. I thought I would push my past behind me once I finally became a missionary, but I've been sharing it more than I thought. I am on a mission because I want everybody possible to have the blessings of the temple in this life.
How has the temple blessed your life? Let me know.
Sincerely,
Sister Smith
Weekly tip to avoid mission-centricness: People keep talking to me about wearing pants and calling home, as if the biggest church changes are just the ones that affect missionary lifestyle. Stay up to date on other changes within the church and share them in conversation and on social media, so other good and important changes get publicized.
On Monday, Sister Larsen and I filled out the evaluations for two-transfer missionaries. I requested to serve in a new location (though Boise has been fun and will always have a little piece of my heart). I can't wait to see where I end up! I have been praying that I can see the Lord's hand in my call and go somewhere I can do the most good.
I am now the proud owner of an orange Boise State University shirt. We were helping someone we teach clean out her closet and she gave it to me. I don't know what I'll do with it after the month is over. I'm definitely not going to wear it around BYU campus after my mission. My pet peeve is when students wear other college gear. I always want to stop people and say, "Hey buddy, I see Yale that you were dumb and rejected you after you bought that shirt in high hopes, would you mind burning it now?"
Boise is a nice enough town and I kind of like road trips, so maybe I'll drive up here someday if BYU ever plays BSU at an away game. I'd have to wear BYU gear to that, though.
This week, I taught a great lesson about temples to a returning member mother and her tween/teen daughters. One of the girls is 11. I looked over the temple pamphlet I wanted to give them and found it was outdated, so I pulled out a pen and edited the 12 to 11. When it came time to hand the pamphlet to them, the eleven year old was the one who reached out her hand. I gave it to her and explained that if she were to join the church, she's now old enough to enter the temple. Temple-related changes are big to me and I told them the story of how I finally got my temple endowment.
Some changes in the church are made with a lot of fanfare. Others are invisible. Manuals get updated and you have to read through them to notice any changes are there. Though President Nelson is lauded (rightly so) for introducing many changes in the church, the biggest change that affected me happened under President Monson. Historically, people didn't get their endowment until they were married, went on missions, or much later in life, if neither of those two happened. Barring single people from the temple simply because they haven't served missions is no more. At age twenty, I was one of very few of my friends to not be endowed yet. Being barred from a mission left me so thoroughly beaten down. I wanted to feel God's love for me and thought the best way I could do that would be to receive my endowment. I took temple prep twice. I researched temples worldwide, volunteered on an archeological dig where I sorted through pieces of the original Nauvoo Temple baptismal font, and read the Pearl of Great Price and Genesis, because I knew those parts of the scripture related to the temple. After all this, I told my bishop that I wanted to receive my endowment.
He told me, "You are more prepared to receive your endowment then any young person I've talked to, but I'm not going to let you because you aren't going on a mission." He showed me his outdated manual to explain his verdict.
That kickstarted the lowest spiritual year of my life. I had done nothing to make me unworthy of a temple recommend and I knew my desire was well within church policy. Three months later, my dad, who serves as first counselor to that bishop, looked through the updated online version of the manual and found that the paragraph barring non-missionaries from the temple had been removed. With my knowledge of that policy confirmed, I spent the next nine months asking my dad to ask that bishop to give me an endowment interview. It took a full calendar year for that to happen. In the meantime, I moved around to various wards with my transient college lifestyle. Three other bishops neglected to help me.
During this year of temple rejection, I often thought about the pre-1978 black members of the church. We talk a lot about how black men were historically barred from receiving the priesthood, but I think being barred from the temple is a much bigger deal because that affected black women as well.
It takes tremendous faith and grit to remain in a religion that has marginalized you. I have the greatest respect for those black members who remained in the church during that era. I felt like I had a lot in common with them that year and I am so, so grateful to be living in an era blessed by change, when temples are dotting the earth and anyone who is worthy can enter them.
My brother, who was baptized as a child but now attends an Episcopalian church, asked me why I remained in the church after all that was done to me. I told him, "There have been times I believed the church was not good, but I never believed the church was not true."
That's my first reason. My second reason is because I wanted the blessings of the temple in my life. Also, I wanted to be allowed to be a missionary, no matter how long that wait took.
On January 3, 2018, I received my endowment in the Salt Lake Temple. I finally felt love. On January 3, 2019, I woke up in Boise for my first day as a missionary.
I shared an abbreviated version of my story in this temple lesson this week.
This was the first lesson I prepared from scratch, rather than using Preach My Gospel or Come Follow Me. It's also my favorite lesson I've done so far. I'm proud of it. Sister Larsen said she felt the Spirit and I believe I made an impact on the family I was teaching. I thought I would push my past behind me once I finally became a missionary, but I've been sharing it more than I thought. I am on a mission because I want everybody possible to have the blessings of the temple in this life.
How has the temple blessed your life? Let me know.
Sincerely,
Sister Smith
Weekly tip to avoid mission-centricness: People keep talking to me about wearing pants and calling home, as if the biggest church changes are just the ones that affect missionary lifestyle. Stay up to date on other changes within the church and share them in conversation and on social media, so other good and important changes get publicized.
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